The firegrid Blog. Thoughts, humour, ranting and general randomness. Wowzers!


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Website News  (29 Posts)

Fri 5th September 2008

stark Template

Filed under: Website News

'stark' is my latest Free Template release.

This is a simple template designed primarily for small corporate websites. It uses a very soothing colour scheme which is designed to be easy to view. It uses large fonts in several areas for maximum impact.

Head on over to the Templates page for the live demo or to grab the download.
Wed 3rd September 2008

The Website is down: Sales Guy vs. Web Dude

Filed under: Humour

I stumbled across this video earlier and actually lolled.  Absolutely hilarious.  Give it a few minutes to get going, and if you work in technical support, or have ever had to speak to us tech guys, I'm sure you'll find this hilarious.

Please note, there are a few mild swear words in the video.  Head on over to The Website is Down for the full story and other fun and games.
Tue 2nd September 2008

Google launches its own browser

Filed under: Internet and Technology

Search giant Google is releasing its own web browser product called 'Chrome'.  It should be released today as a Beta for Microsoft Windows users only.

Chrome's main list of features are as follows:

Google Chrome is Google’s open source browser project. As rumored before under the name of “Google Browser”, this will be based on the existing rendering engine Webkit. Furthermore, it will include Google’s Gears project.

The browser will include a JavaScript Virtual Machine called V8, built from scratch by a team in Denmark, and open-sourced as well so other browsers could include it. One aim of V8 was to speed up JavaScript performance in the browser, as it’s such an important component on the web today. Google also say they’re using a “multi-process design” which they say means “a bit more memory up front” but over time also “less memory bloat.” When web pages or plug-ins do use a lot of memory, you can spot them in Chrome’s task manager, “placing blame where blame belongs.”

Google Chrome will use special tabs. Instead of traditional tabs like those seen in Firefox, Chrome puts the tab buttons on the upper side of the window, not below the address bar.

The browser has an address bar with auto-completion features. Called ’omnibox’, Google says it offers search suggestions, top pages you’ve visited, pages you didn’t visit but which are popular amd more. The omnibox (“omni” is a prefix meaning “all”, as in “omniscient” – “all-knowing”) also lets you enter e.g. “digital camera” if the title of the page you visited was “Canon Digital Camera”. Additionally, the omnibox lets you search a website of which it captured the search box; you need to type the site’s name into the address bar, like “amazon”, and then hit the tab key and enter your search keywords.

As a default homepage Chrome presents you with a kind of “speed dial” feature, similar to the one of Opera. On that page you will see your most visited webpages as 9 screenshot thumbnails. To the side, you will also see a couple of your recent searches and your recently bookmarked pages, as well as recently closed tabs.

Chrome has a privacy mode; Google says you can create an “incognito” window “and nothing that occurs in that window is ever logged on your computer.” The latest version of Internet Explorer calls this InPrivate. Google’s use-case for when you might want to use the “incognito” feature is e.g. to keep a surprise gift a secret. As far as Microsoft’s InPrivate mode is concerned, people also speculated it was a “porn mode.”

Web apps can be launched in their own browser window without address bar and toolbar. Mozilla has a project called Prism that aims to do similar (though doing so may train users into accepting non-URL windows as safe or into ignoring the URL, which could increase the effectiveness of phishing attacks).

To fight malware and phishing attempts, Chrome is constantly downloading lists of harmful sites. Google also promises that whatever runs in a tab is sandboxed so that it won’t affect your machine and can be safely closed. Plugins the user installed may escape this security model, Google admits.

Good luck to you Google, you're entering an already crowded market but with your name I'm sure Chrome will do well.  I'll certainly be giving it a go!  Read more over at Google's Blog.
Tue 19th August 2008

Refreshed Template

Filed under: Website News

'Refreshed' is my latest Free Template release.

This is a smooth and soothing template designed for websites which need to display a lot of content or which have a lot of pages.  It is designed primarily to give a corporate look and feel but is suitable for a personal site also.

Head on over to the Templates page for the live demo or to grab the download.
Mon 11th August 2008

East Anglian Boy!

Filed under: Humour

Being an East Anglian boy myself, I just had to share this video.  Genius!

Tue 5th August 2008

Golf Clipper Cabrio for sale

Filed under: Personal

My brother has his Golf Clipper up for sale so I said I'd stick it on here to try and generate some interest.  Read on for more details.

1993 K Reg MK1 golf, 1800 clipper, powerhood, electric windows, remote central locking, category 2 immobiliser, 83,000 miles.

Lowered 60mm, 15” Ronal Turbo alloy wheels, VR6 front splitter, M3 style rear lights, crystal crosshair headlights, crystal indicators, de-locked, german metal pressed numberplates and surrounds, stainless steel fuel neck pipe, K&N air filter, de-badged grille, grille spoiler, all original paintwork.

Wolfsburg gear knob, door pins, mirror adjusters and rear window handles, trimsport handbrake lever, alloy heater controls, wolfsburg steering wheel.

13cm infinity component set, infinity 6x4, infinity 12” sub in box and 4 channel pioneer amp. Some Service History, 12 months MOT and remainder of tax.

£2700 OVNO - if interested please contact me and I will pass on contact details for my brother.  The car is located in Norfolk.
Sat 2nd August 2008

Pendulum do Violet Hill

Filed under: Random Stuff

Pendulum were on Radio 1 the other day in the live lounge.  The live lounge acts normally do a live version of one of their own songs and a live cover.  Being Pendulum, I couldn't possibly think of which cover they were going to do - but in a stroke of pure genious they did Coldplay's brilliant Violet Hill, and what a version!  If you're a fan of either band just have a listen and see what you think.

Fri 1st August 2008

World's oldest jokes

Filed under: Humour

UK Televsion channel 'Dave' have compiled a list of the world's oldest recorded jokes.  I recommend you hold on to your sides for they may well split as here comes the top ten:

1.  Something which has never occurred since time immemorial: a young woman did not fart in her husband's lap (1900 BC – 1600 BC Sumerian Proverb Collection 1.12-1.13)

2.  How do you entertain a bored pharaoh? You sail a boatload of young women dressed only in fishing nets down the Nile and urge the pharaoh to go catch a fish (An abridged version first found in 1600 BC on the Westcar Papryus)

3.  Three ox drivers from Adab were thirsty: one owned the ox, the other owned the cow and the other owned the wagon's load. The owner of the ox refused to get water because he feared his ox would be eaten by a lion; the owner of the cow refused because he thought his cow might wander off into the desert; the owner of the wagon refused because he feared his load would be stolen. So they all went. In their absence the ox made love to the cow which gave birth to a calf which ate the wagon's load. Problem: Who owns the calf?! (1200 BC)

4.  A woman who was blind in one eye has been married to a man for 20 years. When he found another woman he said to her, "I shall divorce you because you are said to be blind in one eye." And she answered him: "Have you just discovered that after 20 years of marriage!?" (Egyptian circa 1100 BC)

5.  Odysseus tells the Cyclops that his real name is nobody. When Odysseus instructs his men to attack the Cyclops, the Cyclops shouts: "Help, nobody is attacking me!" No one comes to help. (Homer. The Odyssey 800 BC)

6.  Question: What animal walks on four feet in the morning, two at noon and three at evening? Answer: Man. He goes on all fours as a baby, on two feet as a man and uses a cane in old age (Appears in Oedipus Tyrannus and first performed in 429 BC)

7.  Man is even more eager to copulate than a donkey - his purse is what restrains him (Egyptian, Ptolemaic Period 304 BC – 30 BC)

8.  Augustus was touring his Empire and noticed a man in the crowd who bore a striking resemblance to himself. Intrigued he asked: "Was your mother at one time in service at the Palace?" "No your Highness," he replied, "but my father was." (Credited to the Emporer Augustus 63 BC – 29 AD)

9.  Wishing to teach his donkey not to eat, a pedant did not offer him any food. When the donkey died of hunger, he said "I've had a great loss. Just when he had learned not to eat, he died." (Dated to the Philogelos 4th /5th Century AD)

10.  Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: "In silence." (Collected in the Philogelos or "Laughter-Lover" the oldest extant jest book and compiled in the 4th/5th Century AD)

Read more over at the UKTV site.
Mon 28th July 2008


Filed under: Personal

For Christmas last year I received the complete series 1 and 2 boxset of Spaced on DVD.  Series 1 was released back in 1999 so I never got to watch it as I was normally out of an evening drinking my body weight in Alcopops and generally having a right ol' laugh.  However I had heard of it but never got round to watching the repeats.

Anyway, the boxset has sat in my DVD cupboard until this weekend when I decided to remove the selophane wrapper and stick Disc 1 into the DVD player.

All I can say is.....brilliant!  What a show.  Spaced stars the brilliant Simon Pegg, Nick Frost and Jessica Hynes (formely Stevenson) and is essentially the story of Simon's character Tim and Jessica's character Daisy living together as flat mates.  Tim is a comic artist and works part time in a comic store, while Daisy is a writer.  Unfortunately, neither of them can ever seem to get their desired careers off the ground so Tim stays stuck in the comic shop and Daisy eventually tries a series of different jobs to get some cash (after a failed attept at benefit fraud).

Along with Tim and Daisy, we have Mike who is a guns and all things military obsessed wannabe soldier who got thrown out of the TA for stealing a tank and trying to single handedly invade Paris while on weekend manoeuvres in France.  Brian, who is a rather dark and angry artist, desperate to get recognition but at the same time desperate to stay hidden away from society.  Twist, Daisy's best friend and a slave to fashion and all things Prada, and finally Marsha, the permananetly drunk land lady having turbulent times with her teenage daughter.

The other characters and the constant references to popular cult films make Spaced excellent viewing - if you're a fan of Pegg's films you'll know exactly what to expect ;)  If you haven't got it, get it - definitely worth a watch.
Wed 23rd July 2008

IceCold Template

Filed under: Website News

'IceCold' is my latest Free Template release.

This is a striking template designed primarily for small corporate websites.  Its use of blues and contrasting whites make a real impact.

Head on over to the Templates page for the live demo or to grab the download.